When I wanted to commit self-immolation because of challenges caused by the pandemic I could not have imagined that someday I would be taking care of people infected with coronavirus. Back then transgender women, who were left without income and a place to live, resorted to such radical form of protest in order to have their voices heard by the government. It was this protest that helped me start working as a nurse aide and help people.

I remember when I first went to work my whole body was shaking. After having experienced so much violence and oppression I was feeling intimidated by new environment and strangers. I was used to getting insulted by them. However, I was still determined to accept this challenge.

They say that transgender people do not want to work, otherwise they don’t experience any problem with access to employment. I firmly wanted to go against this stereotype and to prove that it was not in my interest to stand on the street. To the contrary, I always wanted to get education, work and be a part of society, however I had to face a number of obstacles.

Lack of family support was one of them. When they found out about my identity, I left Sagarejo for Tbilisi and started living in the open air. I chose Baratashvili Bridge as a shelter. I used to sleep in underground passages in the rain and wind. It was most difficult for me when I lost contact with my family forever. I understand that they too are under public pressure, but it is still hard to accept that they did not even try to secretly help me while living on the streets. Because of the rejection I could not continue my studies, I could not develop professionally and I could not start working.

During the pandemic, Vivamedi Clinic appeared in my life. Director Nino Kuzanova offered me a job as a nurse aide. My orientation did not matter for her. The main thing was to do the job well. She also gave me a promise that no one would oppress me there. I agreed. They sent me to an experienced nurse, taught me everything and transferred me to the haematology department.

It has already been three months that upon my request I’ve been working in Covid department and I also contribute to strengthening the clinic. My duties include distributing food and tidying up the wards. I often try to take on some small duties of my co-workers as well. An integral part of my job is a face mask, glasses, protective face shield, gloves and special clothing that I sometimes can’t take off for 2-3 hours, which is a big inconvenience. However, fatigue cannot overweight the feeling of pleasure obtained through helping people. It is difficult when you get used to the patients and see them struggling for life.

Many distorted notions have changed in this area. Medical staff saw that I was an ordinary person and I did not attack anyone. To the contrary, I help everyone, deliver high quality work and give a lot of warmth. I have a healthy relationship with all co-workers. Patients love me as well – they look forward to my shift and attention. We have established a good relationship, which is also thanks to my right communication approach.

On the other hand, my stereotypes were also broken. I expected that my co-workers would not accept me and I avoided communication with them. However, we even became friends. Yes, I do get tired physically, but I still feel free. I became so interested in medicine that I started thinking about taking nursing courses in the future.

However, at the same time, beyond the clinic there is my second, completely different life, which is full of indifference. Therefore, integration is very important. If you let me in your life, with equal rights and opportunities, I will show you and prove to you how I can be a responsible citizen, a friend or and co-worker.

Photo by Mano Svanidze